Thursday, June 16, 2005

My, how we laughed....

All movies have to have a "tagline". The "tagline" for the forthcoming movie version of "The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe" is going to be....and you may want to sit down before you read this....:

"There are a thousand stories in Narnia. The first is about to be told."

18 comments:

  1. 1000??? I thought there were only 7.


    Parker

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  2. About to be told? Is it being told yet?


    [glances at watch]

    How about now?

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  3. I truly cannot find the words to properly express my feelings in this matter. Although if I could, "bollocks" would probably be one of them.

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  4. Aaaand, cue Narnia reading order flamewar...

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  5. Aren't they just children's books, anyway?
    Colin

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  6. What, in all seriousness, would you propose as the tagline? Anyone?

    This tagline tells you it's set in Narnia, which may mean something to some but for other movie goers is just a name for a fantasy land to juxtapose with Middle Earth.

    It tells you a little about Narnia – it must be an interesting/exciting place because there are a thousand stories there. (Alternative, it can be viewed as a place where stories, and thus storytelling, is culturally significant.)

    It assures you that you don't need to have seen any previous movies (I'm sure I don't need tell you about "The Madness of King George"). (Alternatively, it assures you there won't be any later prequels, imagine the possible problems if you began a story at episode 4!)

    And it's "about to be told", which is a fairly obvious instruction that you should get to a movie screen and listen to the story.

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  7. "It was a time of beavers..."

    "He was a talking lion; she was the child of a war-torn continent.."

    "The is no victory without sacrifice"

    "Roar power"

    "It's not an allegory, honest."

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  8. "In a time, and a place . . . of snow . . . a faun . . . will learn the price of betrayal . . . four children . . . will save a realm . . . and Father Christmas . . . will almost certainly be written out of the story."

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  9. Don't these fools recognize that the first story is The Magician's Nephew?

    Andrew Reeves

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  10. Earl WajenbergFriday, 17 June, 2005

    "It's all in Plato! What *do* they teach them at these schools nowadays?"

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  11. Earl WajenbergFriday, 17 June, 2005

    By the way, judging by the pictures posted at www.narniaweb.com, Father Christmas is not written out, nor does he look much like a department store Santa.

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  12. Don't these fools recognize that the first story is The Magician's Nephew?

    Maybe they do and have simply recognized the fact that TMN is dreary to the point of being soporific.

    Honestly, I don't know how they plan to make a film series out of these books. Apart form TLTW&TW, only The Silver Chair is worth reading, and even then it's only the best of a bad lot.

    -Abigail

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  13. (Alternatively, it assures you there won't be any later prequels, imagine the possible problems if you began a story at episode 4!)

    Which means some people may be in for a surprise if they get to movie six.

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  14. Awful slogan -- Mike Hammer meets Helm Hammerhand.

    'So dis dame wawks inna muh awffice, awkay. She got hair down tuh HERE, but her gams was white as alabaster. An' so wuz her face. So I sez tuh heuh, "Sistuh, ya lookin' faw a private eye?" But she sez "Unhand us, dog, for we are the Empress Jadis!"...'

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  15. "Once a friend of Narnia, always a friend of Narnia."

    "Onwards and upwards, Narnia and the North!"

    Either of those might have got me to see it, if the child actress who has the temerity to pretend to be Lucy Pevensey wasn't so appalling.

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  16. "He's not a tame lion."

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  17. Jo---I don't know about the first one, but that second line is from "The Horse and His Boy", and it's spoken by Bree, who is a horse. Not by Lucy Pevensie.

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  18. Just found some interesting stuff on the upcoming Chronicles of Narnia film. narnia

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